If you anit got no money TAKE YER BROKE A@@ HOME!

Are you ready??
You Say ~~~~~

If you anit got no money take yer broke a@@ home!!!
G-L-A-M-O-R-O-U-R-S Yeeeah!

ah yes tipping and let's go there shall we! We shall! We all have dreams and goals and a life outside of waiting tables. Somehow the guests seems to ferget we have brains and intelligence.


While they're whining I mean dining in our fine establishment and wonderful company that has our back when we have cheap quests and will do anything and everything to throw us under the bus when it comes down to TIP OR NOT TOO then analyze us personally and pick apart our service. That baddd word T-I-P! If you have money to DINE-OUT you have money to tip! Considering most of us waitstaff cannot afford to feed ourselves and we do our fair share of scrounging around getting food out of the window. Is is dead enough to eat or too dead to eat!

The moronic CHEEP Guest logic: ( It's not denial about not to tip out my server, I'm just very selective about the reality I accept) Great logic when my rent is due so glad your here to dine with us and your my guests....ahem


As if we don't deserve a tip most of us do! I have seen some purdy amazing excuses from idiot people trying like hell to get out of tipping a server! From angry wives to cheap family members who say they got the bill and then you look who is responsible for the tip another family member that was a pain in the !@#$ to take care of this whole entire time and they're going to tip you errr my skin crawls sometimes. When the grat is added for parties of eight or more I have seen people fight that many times well she wasn't that good or the food was bad but we ate it they know dyam well when they walked in there are signs more than once we add the grat. We drop the check and all of a sudden they can't read? OR pratice and apply basic addition only subtraction. Some servers carry calculators CRIPS??? bcuz they ARE gheeeetOOOE! In the ghetto who needs to vist the ghetto the ghetto comes to you for a vist!!! yeeeaye!


A Birthday party came in huge on a Sunday afternoon demanding of course all separate checks OF COURSE! They tell you at the last minute so yer behind and weeded now fixing all 20 checks with discounts gahlore I've had people ask me the lamest questions for discounts? Why yes today is guess yer servers favorite color day anyone who guess's right eats free! and here's the catch the money for the tab goes to me for my TIP! and I pocket it! yeeeeaye!!! GAMES! yes let's play them! I know them all. These type of people are really reaching and pathetic!


and NOW the Jedi mind game of confuse yer server begins:

Oh she's with me and I'm with him and he's over there and these three are my kids and not that one blah blah blah musical chairs now! BOO FRIGGEN HOO! I have been doing this wayy to long I am very aware of the bathroom breaks and talking on phones to distract me and chair hopping you got the wrong girl whadda I look like? cell phone, bathroom breaks,chair moving
You are still going to PAY! Stall all you want! Ree-DICK-CUE-LESS

I fix their checks all 20 of them. The grat is added on each check. One guest didn't pay!!! One check remains open! They bolted and hit the door! VERY GHETTO!!! And many many many Server spell Voodoo's to you that follow. Toe and feet VooDoo's to you! as my co-workers are hugging me some are wiping my tears and some are moving there fingers up and down towards the door the quest just bolted out of saying many many many VooDoo's I am convinced bad things happen to people who stiff Servers and run out on their checks. I like to call it Server Voodoo what you measure out comes right back to you like a boomerang. I hate walk-outs!
It sucks to be me! =(

So now comes the write up that I am careless??? hmm yea careless from a stoopid party that ate like PIGS made a mess ran my butt I deserved a fat tip. They thought they could get out of tipping if they had separate checks??? Woe talk about cheap! Waitstaff personal are human tip detectors we can see right threw you and know from experience's appearance's and what comes out of the guests mouth how cheap your A@@ really is. Ever hear a bird chirp?
CHEEP! CHEEP! CHEEP! It catches on in the Wait Station with other Servers we all mimic
CHEEP! CHEEP! CHEEP! and who could forget the Sesame Street Martians
YEP! YEP! YEP! AHHHUH AHHHUH CHEEP! CHEEP! CHEEP! Now the whole Wait Station is repeating each other with YEP YEP AHHUH AHUH AND CHEEP CHEEP CHEEP!

This industry can't be so cold! My Daddy told me so he let his daughter know!

If you anit got no money take yer broke a@@ home!



Yours Truly

Waitstress